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Humor

Jagdlied: a Chamber Novel for Narrator, Musicians, Pantomimists, Dancers & Culinary Artists

WARNING to prospective readers as to this title’s potentially shocking and disturbing (read: X-RATED!!!) graphic and literary content: A reviewer at LITERARY TITAN, though giving this book a five-star rating, finalized his review with the caveat: “To the intrigued rea ...

Things Go Wrong for Me

FINALIST - 2013 Next Generation Indie Book Awards (Humor/Humour) FINALIST - 2013 National Indie Excellence Book Awards (Humor/Humour) Think you've got it bad? You ain't seen nothing yet. Murphy's Law, meet Rodney's Law. If it can go wrong, it has already happened to Rodney Lacroix in the worst, most comedic way humanly possible. And you'll find all of those stories right here, in full-color detail ...

Powerballs: Be careful what you wish for.

"A lively beach or commute read, this quick, cheerful parody of aging, capitalism, and marriage offers a little bit of everything--comedy, suspense, romance--and even some insights into the meaning of life."
-Booklife by Publishers Weekly
 
"A mysterious author delivers the comical tale...a raucous adventure around the globe...brisk, deba ...

A Dead Tomato Plant and a Paycheck

What on earth do a dead tomato plant and a paycheck have in common? Maryann Miller explores the fun and foibles of how to survive parenting a large family, while vainly keeping body and mind intact. From School Daze to Summertime Blues, and everything in between, the book airs the Miller laundry with all the holes and missing buttons. She answers important family questions such as: What's for dinn ...

The Cover Up

What links a webcam girl, a cross-dressing police chief and an escaped ferret? A British nation torn by Brexit staggers on. Frankie Ferret, a pre-school children’s TV celebrity escapes into sewers of London and surely is dead. The people unite in grief. Police Chiefs, counselors and politicos stand in tear stained sincerity with the common people. Viktor Pinupskin of Russia offers a genetically mo ...

Christmas Grift

A corpse, a cantankerous camel, an entertaining array of suspects, and a yule tide of problems along the way…it must be a Flo and Agnes Christmas! Who would have guessed Agnes would rub Penelope the cranky camel the wrong way? Or that Flo would find herself ankle deep in camel dung while fending off a masked murderer? Or that TC would, once again, get on the wrong side of her handsome detective in ...

Johnny Books: The Complete Organized Crime Trilogy

Johnny Books 1-3 make up The Organized Crime Trilogy. Johnny Tee is a wandering vagabond with a troubled past and an even bleaker future. His decision to go the straight and narrow goes haywire when he gets mixed up in the city's dirty underbelly. Coming out on top is going to be tougher than he thinks due to the fact that he is both a magnet for trouble and a complete moron. It's going to take th ...

Just Add Water (Hetta Coffey Series, Book 1)

HETTA COFFEY IS A SASSY TEXAN WITH A SNAZZY YACHT, AND SHE'S NOT AFRAID TO USE IT! Just Add Water, winner of the National EPPIE Award for BEST MYSTERY. Hetta Coffey is a globe-trotting civil engineer with a swath of failed multi-national affairs in her jet stream. Plying the San Francisco waterfront, trolling for triceps, her attention is snagged by a parade of passing yachts—especially thei ...

Golden Monkey

Little Lance Pototschnik wanted to grow up and play pro football, but that pipe dream got smoked by his lethargic growth hormones and a terrible skin disorder. The death of his childhood aspirations did, however, plant the seeds for Lance to find comedy in rejection and suffering. In this gaspingly funny collection of stories, Lance’s battle with disease, his overbearing parents, and his maniacal ...

Amusing Musings

Warning: This book may be a choking hazard if read while eating or drinking. If you’re a fan of Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey, then you’re going to love Amusing Musings. Get ready to enjoy the most hilarious book of the year. This hysterical compilation of profound thoughts and hilarious one liners will make you laugh until you cry. Relish ridiculously "profound" quotes such as these: “I bet a popu ...

Perhaps I've Said Too Much - A Great Big Book of Messing with People

There's a prankster in all of us. Whether you're carving evil messages into your coworker's banana peel or telling your kids that, yes, raisins are actually dehydrated people, there's a certain, sinister-yet-fun draw to really messing with people. In Perhaps I’ve Said Too Much (the much anticipated follow-up to the heralded, award-winning Things Go Wrong For Me), Rodney Lacroix gives the rea ...

Dead and Breakfast

The Big Easy has plenty of song… …a lot of dancing and a bit of murder. Will Brandy be able to prove her friend is innocent? Brandy learned to be loyal in Catholic school. She doesn’t judge. When her best friend, Julia, an ex-stripper turned hotelier, finds the first guest of her new Bed and Breakfast, murdered, she’s on her way to help. Why do the police think Julia did it? There’s a ...

How To Murder a Millionaire

Murder. Millionaires. Mankinis. Armed with her newly issued private investigator's license, Maggie Doyle is on the case…of a sheep that went missing twenty-two years ago. When she trips over a dead body on the first day of the investigation, Maggie realizes there’s more to this cold case than a fight over lamb chops. An invitation to spend the weekend with her grandmother’s oldest friend ...

Didn't Get Frazzled

A provocative and humorous novel about four years in the life of an intrepid young medical student, set in the grueling world of an elite NYC medical school. “…the best fictional portrayal of med school since ER.” – BlueInk Review, starred review 2017 International Book Awards Bronze Medal Winner in Fiction - Humor/Comedy (Readers' Favorite) and INDIES Book of the Year Finalist Medical student Set ...

It Gets Easier: A Short Tale of Comical Catastrophe

He'd never guess that his very courage to commit could be the cause of his own downfall. Jake's loved and lost, suffered failed relationships and felt real sorrow, but the new girl in his life may just be the one to finally put an end to that life. His girlfriend Samantha is sweet and kind, full of joy, and the kind of girl Jake can be perfectly content sitting in complete silence with. It's so co ...

Collar Cases #2: Case of the Missing Monet

A field trip to the local art museum with Mittens's rambunctious nieces takes an unexpected turn when a priceless Monet painting is stolen! With their reputations on the line, the museum leadership desperately turns to Mittens and Alex for help. Will the detectives see past the deception around them to discern friend from foe? Could this be another crime organized by the mysterious Ruffled Feather ...

DANG NEAR DEAD #2, Award-winning Aggie Mundeen Mysteries4-book

PLEASE NOTE: Only the first 10 requesters will receive free books. BUT: Amazon has the 4-book AGGIE MUNDEEN series on sale for $8.97 at http://tinyurl.com/AggieMundeen. In DANG NEAR DEAD, Aggie, Detective Sam (traveling incognito) and friend Meredith vacation at a dude ranch, a prickly destination for dudes. Besides wranglers, ex-cons and critters, what could go wrong? When an expert rider flie ...

Fore Play

"A company of spineless, scheming men try to gouge a California country club for every penny it's worth in Sheehan's seamy, steamy comedy of errors." -Kirkus Reviews

"Good book, great read! Laughs, sex, golf, and good wine. What more could you want?" -Danny Jacobson, Creator and Executive Producer of NBC-TV's Mad About You

"Sheehan's plot is witty and droll, and very easy to get ...

History Retweets Itself: Texas Edition

Bill Rodgers makes us laugh until our sides hurt in this hilarious look at current events - today and yesterday. “Bill has been making me laugh for over twenty years!” - Jay Leno “Will tickle your funny bone. Damned clever!” - Jesse Sublett, Author, Musician, Austin Character “Bill knows where the funny is.” - Shannon Sedwick, Esther’s Follies

The Shell of a Person

"Never have disgusting, miserable living conditions been so funny. When someone finally finds a way to send back a report from hell, I hope it will be Lance Pototschnik. Except this guy is going to heaven, for the way he writes." --The Kindle Book Review “Welcome to beautiful Costa Rica! Come and experience our diverse wildlife. Exhume nests of dead baby turtles and stay up all night while mosquit ...

Sick to Death

Knowing you're dying can be murder. When Gage Adder finds out he has inoperable pancreatic cancer, things really start to look up for him. He leaves his soul-crushing job, joins a nice terminal illness support group, and takes up an exciting new hobby: Serial killing.

The Finger Trap

Tony Flaner is a malingering part-time comedian, full-time sarcastic, who’s never had it hard, and never finished a thing in his life. He’s had twelve years to prepare for his divorce and didn’t. He had his entire life to choose a career and hasn’t. Now time’s up, and he’s in a world of trouble. But it gets worse—a first date and a drunken party ends with Tony facing prison for the murder of a gir ...

Johnny Vegas

With $120 dollars in his pocket and his life back on track, Johnny heads out to the one place in the world where absolutely nothing can go wrong: Las Vegas. It isn't long before the good-hearted Johnny is involved with the city's most dangerous criminals. The clock is running and the race is on. Johnny has 24 hours to be a hero. ---------------- Trouble has a way of finding Johnny Tee. A wande ...

3mph: The Adventures of One Woman's Walk Around the World

Polly Letofsky left her Colorado home and headed west across 4 continents and over 14,000 miles--by foot--to become the first woman to walk around the world. In a spirit of adventure, along with the goal of raising global awareness for breast cancer, strangers welcomed her into their homes. The world had embraced her. But in the middle of Polly's journey, 9/11 flung us all into a crossroads in wor ...

First Friday: How virginity almost killed me

This tale of Agnes Anne O’Neil, a 28 year-old virgin who struggles to leave home, will both captivate and tickle your funny bone. You’ll meet her wacky Irish Catholic family, her favorite saints and pet snail, and the evil that pursues her. You’ll chuckle when she introduces her Jewish boyfriend to her parents and worry when her brother-in-law, obsessed with her virginity, won&rs ...

Pillow Stalk

Interior Decorator Madison Night might look like a throwback to the sixties, but as business owner and landlord, she proves that independent women can have it all. But when a killer targets women dressed in her signature style—estate sale vintage to play up her resemblance to fave actress Doris Day—what makes her unique might make her dead. The local detective connects the new crime to ...

Space Cowgirl: Houston, All Systems Go

NASA astronaut Julie Starr knows nothing is earned without blood, sweat, and frizzy hair. Recently returned from orbit, Jules is on her way to becoming the youngest Flight Commander ever. So she isn't about to let a creepy stalker derail her goals. Or a chivalrous, wealthy rancher either, for that matter. Holt West doesn't mess with flirts. And that's exactly what Jules is. He has enough on his pl ...

Almost Heroes

High school senior Santana Harris' parents want her to go to college, to prepare for her future, or---at the very least---to get a job so that she can figure out what life after high school will look like. Santana doesn't want any of that. Convinced that her art will allow her to win a scholarship to a prestigious school, she’s content to coast through her final year. Her parents give her an ultim ...

Barking Mad at Murder

Frankie Chandler is a charlatan. Though she promotes herself as a pet psychic, her profound revelations come from animal behavior books and her ability to interpret the owner’s body language. Then an appointment with a new client goes horribly wrong and leaves her with images of a woman’s murder. Images that came from her canine client. Images that match the description of a body discovered in the ...

Chocolate Truffle Kiss

Writer, Beth, visits the same café every afternoon, enjoying her latte and a chocolate truffle while scribbling in her notebook. The delicious treats keep her coming back day after day, not to mention the inspiration she finds there – Samuel. The barista is tall, dark and delicious, and his stare could melt chocolate from a hundred paces.

Since her divorce, Beth’s lo ...

Collar Cases #1: Case of the Robbed Recipe

Investigative journalists Mittens Meow and Alex Digger race to the rescue when Alex’s favorite baker discovers a shocking theft, threatening the future of her business. Can they uncover the culprit in time? A Christian mystery chapter book for readers 7-12.

The Vasectomy Diaries

From the best-selling author of "Perhaps I've Said Too Much" and "Romantic as Hell."

Almighty: A Short Tale of Omnipotent Proportions

When a staunch atheist is introduced to the Lord Almighty in the most casual—and childish—way, it's not the end of the world. It's a Tuesday. Bradley Michaels is just another man ending just another workday at just another job. He can list the usual complaints, can point his finger at the usual causes, and he can go about his routine as if one day is absolutely no different from the next. Until Go ...

Spoonful Chronicles

Thaniya Rasid grew up in the Middle East dreaming of becoming a surgeon. Now living an ordinary life as a mother, wife and a hospital lab tech in Vancouver, Canada, she garners unexpected fame as youTube’s Queen of Hummus when her video demonstrating the recipe goes viral. How could blending chickpeas in a food processor generate so much excitement? And how could her life have ended up so fa ...

Fame Is A Killer

Hollywood actress Hope Hadley doesn't think that things can get any worse for her. In the last twenty-four hours, her boyfriend has broken up with her and her long-running police procedural TV show has been canceled. 

The Perfect Culture

Thomas Gephardt is a world traveller. Or at least he would like to be one. Determined to leave the confines of his sheltered upbringing in the United States, he voyages to France to expand his horizons. He spends three months with a French family in Bordeaux, working in a local hotel. Inspired by these experiences, Thomas has plans to continue travelling. However, a romantic interest in Paris—an I ...

Groovin': Horses, Hopes, and Slippery Slopes

In this lighthearted memoir of adventure and self-discovery, Rich Israel takes us on his journey during the tumultuous 1960s. Eschewing societal norms, he hitchhikes across the country, tries his hand at mining, works at a circus, and rides a horse hundreds of miles through the Rocky Mountain wilderness—all the while, the draft and the Vietnam War are nipping at his heels. Written in vivid detail, ...

After The Calendar

When it’s your 10th year of fundraising for charity it’s hard to find a new idea. The women come up with a scheme to benefit the local hospice but it goes way past their comfort zone. Can they, should they, go ahead? Then there’s the matter of the Board of Trustees – men who are bound to oppose the women on anything that steps out of the domestic sphere. A humorous story for readers of ...

Chasing Rainbows

Marissa Madison lives with a unique family: an inventive uncle whose experiments usually involve explosions, an artist aunt who collects classic automobiles, a mother caught in a 1950s time warp, and a playboy twin brother who impersonates their eccentric aunt.   Ian MacGregor should have been enjoying a roaring drunk to grieve his father, not selling every piece of personal property so his m ...

Reality Bites

Doesn’t everybody want their five seconds of fame? Daniel North, survivor of a gay pub bombing, wants to share his forgotten story with the world, but he’ll have to settle for millions of viewers in the 18-35 demographic. Complex Neighbours is the latest ratings smash from billionaire media tycoon, Felix Moldoon. Think Big Brother meets the Hunger Games! To win the one-million-pound prize, contest ...

A DEAD RED MIRACLE

#5 in THE DEAD RED MYSTERY SERIES Like Janet Evanovich? Sue Grafton? You’ll love this humorous mystery series! Your dirt-bag boss is murdered, what a relief, right? Until his killer lets you know a list you don’t have means you’re next. Thinking to jump start their careers as private investigators, Lalla and Pearlie Bains partner with an unscrupulous P.I. But their nifty plan starts ci ...

Celebrity sTalker

I stumble upon celebrities all over Los Angeles and HAVE to talk to them. Sometimes this works out. Mostly it doesn't.

Dose Vidanya

Silver Hills Senior and Singles Residence isn’t exactly a boring place. Home to a death predicting cat named Tolstoy, a night manager who may or may not suck blood and float above the floor, a cook with mad voodoo and pie baking powers, and a trio of nosy sleuths who are determined to get to the bottom of the corpse in the library (maybe literally)…some might say things couldn’t get any weirder. S ...

Unhappily Ever After

In Fairyland 200 years after the 'happy ending' Cinderella is plotting to divorce Charming. The other royal families aren't happy either. Sleeping Beauty is making up for all that lost time by producing 28 children her husband can't afford. Snow White, the perfect lady is married to a king who beds every wench in the kingdom. The Grand Annual Ball is approaching to marry off the next generation ...

The Fall of Baby Hitler: Sometimes Evil Wears a Diaper

Bobert McGee is just a regular guy. Anonymous in his job and his life, Bobert's singular obsession is to make a difference in the world. He wants to be noticed. He wants to be famous. He wants to matter. Bobert's desires come true when he stumbles across a time machine for sale on an Internet shopping page. Scrambling all the savings he has, he buys the machine with the intention of changing histo ...

Southlea Bay (3 Book Series)

From Book 1:Librarian Janet Johnson is puzzled when she is invitedand practically draggedto her first meeting of the Rejected Writers Book Club. This quirky group of women would much rather celebrate one anothers rejected manuscripts over cups of tea and slices of lemon cake than actually publish a book. But good friends are exactly what Janet needs after moving to the small town of Southlea Bay, ...

Mustard's Last Stand, A Havoc in Hancock Humorous Suspense

An African safari camp in North Idaho? Won’t happen, not if offbeat eco-activist Roadkill can convince his more sedate brother to help fight the fanatical developer of the canned hunt. Together they brave captive zebras and wildebeests and face down the wannabe big game hunter and his wacky minions. Roadkill knows the safari camp threatens the environment in the mountains in northern Idaho. When h ...

A Scape Goat for Murder

Frankie Chandler’s upcoming nuptials suffer a devastating setback when her fiancé, Detective Martin Bowers, is injured on the job. How badly injured? The doctors are mum on his condition, and his colleagues are just as evasive, telling her they don’t know what he was doing on the lonely hillside where he fell. Convinced that the key to Bowers’ recovery lies in finding out what happened, the pet ps ...

Fun Stories Greatest Hits: Silly Short Stories, Dad Jokes, Puns, and Real-Life Humor

Amazon reviewers call Fun Stories Greatest Hits "the type of silly we all need!" Author R. Scott Murphy has honed his zingers and tongue-in-cheek observations of life as a writer for David Letterman’s Late Show, as a radio DJ, and as a TV host. Now, for the first time, Murphy's best-loved bits are all in one collection. "Mr. Pee Man," "Shamefully Suggestive City Names," "I'm The Freakin' Michael ...

The Spy Who Kissed Me

This suburbanite is about to meet a dashing spy… Isabel “Stan” Stanley is stuck in a rut in the DC suburbs. As a wannabe romance writer, she hopes a sexy muse falls into her lap. But she never expected a handsome spy to dive through her sunroof… Pursued by a hail of bullets, international CIA Agent Kelvin Kapone didn’t have plans to make a friend. But when his latest mission puts him in the ...

Revenge is a Dish Best Served With Eggnog: A Cozy Paranormal Mystery

In the quaint, twinkling town of Christmas Hills, Destiny Mellowes is just about finished with wrapping the last present of the day. When a charming stranger named Carson walks into the modest gift shop owned by her parents and asks for directions to the nearby resort, Destiny has no idea her holiday plans are about to unravel faster than a poorly knitted ugly Christmas sweater. Her cat Velvet, ...

Johnny Zookeeper

Johnny continues his quest to find a spot in the working world and thinks he has finally found the solution: clientele who are in cages and verbally refuse his service. But when Johnny is given more responsibility than he should have, the animals, the customers, and the entire city are in for trouble.

Reality Bites Back Again

“You’ve been cancelled!” Daniel North, now the most famous man in Britain, is navigating the fickle world of celebrity. It’s a daily battle as he opens his DMs – is it another unsolicited nude, or a request for him to kill himself? There’s no grey area with the Reality TV fandom, and he’s reluctantly heading back into the Thunderdome, this time as a judge. Social Media Superstar sees a group of in ...

Death by Windmill: A Mother’s Day Murder in Amsterdam

A Mother’s Day trip to the Netherlands turns deadly when a guest plummets from a windmill. Was it an accident or a murder? For Lana Hansen, the answer will mean freedom or imprisonment for someone close to her… Wanderlust Tours guide Lana Hansen and her mother, Gillian, haven’t seen eye to eye in over a decade, ever since Lana was wrongly fired from her job as an investigative reporter. So when La ...

Some Like It Shot

“Danger was part of my job description, but none of my contingency plans anticipated an attack by a Maine Coon.” It’s summer on Whisper Island. Ex-cop-turned-private-investigator Maggie Doyle is looking forward to sun, fun, and romance. Instead, she gets bills, an assault allegation, and a busted wrist. To add insult to injury, there’s a movie being filmed on the island, and Maggie’s diva sister h ...

Reckless Traveler

Reckless Traveler: an autobiographical novel of adventuring in South America, sure to delight anyone with a passport. Perú and beyond: Through the alchemy of travel, youthful folly may bring disaster or wisdom . . . and more. The instructional travel guide for aspiring backpackers: learn how to bribe police, avoid malaria, and find employment abroad -- and what to do (and not to do) when ar ...

The Weekend Warrior

Weekends are hell.

If you do them right.

That's the subtext of the columns scrawled by Wiley from various states of semi-consciousness as he slinks out of the woodwork and insinuates himself into the soft underbelly of Southern California consciousness. Wilier than a coyote, badder than Santa, Gonzo'er than Dr. Duke, the Wilester lays waste to everybody in range, not least himse ...

My Life in Ladies' Knickers

Another outrageous full-length comedy satire novel from Oscar Sparrow. 

Oscar Sparrow is a sewage trucker a ...

Johnny 12 Steps

The first book in the series introduces us to Johnny Tee, a wandering vagabond with a troubled past and an even bleaker future. A fighter, gambler, and liar Johnny Tee has lived a life that has been one misstep after another. He makes a decision to go the straight and narrow that is going to be harder than he thinks due to the fact that he is a complete idiot. Navigating the city's dirty underbell ...

Reality Bites Back

”Your dreams and crushed, goodbye!” Daniel North is forced back into the world of Reality TV when one of his former competitors is murdered. Now considered a “celebrity” Daniel must battle against an old adversary and face the music – literally! Celebrity Tone Death sees a bunch of Z-listers take a final shot at glory, all under the guise of winning a one-million-pound donation to their chosen cha ...

The Case of the Not-So-Fair Trader ( A Richard Sherlock Whodunit book 1)

A despicable stock trader is found buried under an avalanche of his own garden rocks, causing fired-from-the force- Richard Sherlock to be yanked off the bowling alley and whisked to the crime scene by his pampered protegee Tiffany Richmond. He must prove murder and stop payment of the twelve-million-dollar Richmond Insurance policy. Nothing makes sense. Crime scene is a mess. There is no money tr ...

Space Junk: Houston, We Have a Hottie

NASA engineer Dr. Jackie Darling Lee is a genius about many things... the male species is not one of them (despite the many cowboy romances she reads). Then a little friendly blackmail from a co-worker has Jackie walking into a Texas saloon ready to initiate Operation Social Life. After making friends with her waitress and helping a drunk country beauty get home safely, she thinks she’s off to a g ...

Street Dog Dreams

What if dogs were royalty and humans their loyal servants? Hop aboard our invisible flying machine as Aunt Maddie and Uncle Horace join an international search for a new dogdom. The Royal Canines are recruiting street dogs who want a better life with devoted humans who speak the language of dogs. As foretold in an enchanted tapestry, their dream will turn an abandoned village in Sardinia, Italy, i ...

The Rejected Writers Christmas Wedding

Southlea Bay's favorite sweethearts, Flora and Dan, are getting married and the members of the Rejected Writers' Book Club are excited to help. Especially the group's head honcho, Doris Newberry, who, much to Flora’s frustration, wants to control every detail, attempting to strong-arm Flora into accepting ridiculous wedding vows, wayward bongo players and into wearing a huge, old-fashioned wedding ...

Rubber Match

St. Batzy & the Time Machine

After all the years they had been married, Maddie Ainsworth's presence still had the ability to discombobulate Horace. She was as tall as his own six feet--the reason they saw eye-to-eye on most things, they joked. To Horace, she was more beautiful than when they met thirty-some years ago. Maddie loved Horace more than anything or anyone in her life. When they met, they both believed they could ch ...

Bride of Careful-ish

If your wedding venue cancels your wedding but keeps your deposit, and your parents continue badmouthing your fiancée, who keeps jabbing at you about your weight, would you think the universe was trying to tell you something?

Kimi sure does. Her friends disagree. But why do they get a say? For better or for worse, over the course of lockdown in New York City, these six diverse friends have be ...

A DEAD RED OLEANDER

#3 in THE DEAD RED MYSTERY SERIES "Janet Evanovich meets aero-ag pilots." The Kindle Book Review What if quitting your boring job put you in line for murder? Her beloved great aunt wants to bar-b-que dad's side-kick, Bruce the goat, and her man-hungry cousin has her sights set on her number one pilot. What else could possibly go wrong? Oh yeah, her new pilot is really a CPA hiding from a vicious L ...

The 39 Cupcakes

Ex-cop-turned-P.I. Maggie Doyle is stuck chaperoning a group of bratty summer camp kids to an archaeological dig on Whisper Island. After a day of fart jokes, fidget spinners, and fist fights, Maggie's regretting volunteering—and then one of her feral charges discovers a skeleton. At first it looks like a cold case, but the situation takes a sinister turn when a member of the excavation team winds ...

Johnny Driver

Fate and idiocy has brought Johnny to Maui. In the final book of the first Johnny Trilogy, Johnny in Maui, working for an international crime organization against his will. Johnny is finally valuable because of his natural born ability to drive. He will have to drive anything and everything in order to save the world. It's too bad for us that he is a complete moron.

Dead Man's Trench

DISCOVER THIS SIZZLING SERIES OF COZY MYSTERIES SET IN THE SWEEPING LANDSCAPE OF NORFOLK. A man lies dead, deep in an excavation trench, an angry villager's signature on a damming piece of evidence, and a race against time to discover the truth. When the corpse of a hated local man is discovered, smelling of whiskey and with his head split open, the police conclude its suicide. Ant and Lyn aren't ...

If You See Kay Freeze

What's an elf to do? Ladies, ready for another giggle-snort filled mystery? Darn that Nicky Stromboli! He’s the reason BJ has to get a job moonlighting as a winter elf. She swears that the glitter-tights that come with her costume were designed by the devil himself as a torture device. Lucky for BJ, she's crowned the new Queen Wintergreen. Whoop! More money and no tights. But wearing a wedding dre ...

Tangled Up In Tuesday: A Page Turners Novel

Organized accountant Zoey Allen likes her life neat and tidy. But it goes from managed to messy when a dead body ends up in her apartment on an ordinary Tuesday night. After uncovering a money-laundering scheme in a routine audit at her company, Zoey finds herself the target in a murderous plot that doesn't quite add up. Good thing she has Mac--a handsome police officer--and the Page Turners book ...

A DEAD RED ALIBI

When Lalla and her dad take a trip to Arizona to inspect her new property, Dad disappears. Panicked that he's lost in the desert, Lalla enlists the help of a local tracker and finds him unharmed at the bottom of a mine pit. But dad has company. A very dead local police chief. And within a stone's throw, a young artist will be found strangled in her bed. What're the chances that these two murder ...

Call Me Pomeroy

Pomeroy, a towering street musician on parole, is out of the clink for the umpteenth time and wants to become a rock star. With fame and fortune in mind, he heads to Occupy Oakland, hoping to get on television, attract an agent, and score a million dollar contract for Ants in My Pants, his marathon ditty. Pomeroy is a skirmish-loving, dumpster-diving, narcissistic crazy who thinks he can sing like ...

What the Cluck? It's Murder

Pet psychic Frankie Chandler finally (and reluctantly) agrees to meet Detective Martin Bower’s family. All she has to do is impress the pack of sisters who raised him. Not difficult, right? The only thing at stake is her relationship with the man she loves. The weekend at his eldest sibling’s farm surpasses her worst nightmares. His former guardians excel at finding her faults. Even the chicke ...

The Swines: Anecdotes Of A Piggly Family

“Eclectic, eccentric, and original. Fast-paced. Absurd. Whimsical.” ─ Suidae Gazette
“Cheeky, original, and witty. Wickedly fun!” ─ Bacon Daily News
“Politically incorrect. Genius!” ─ Young Hogs


Whimsical and light-hearted, The Swines is the curious anecdotes of Sam, a twelve-year-old boy from a family of pigs. His mom is an English sow, a British ...

Mommy Tried to Kill Me

The true story of the four months I spent in Paris, France taking care of my Mom and trying not to have a nervous breakdown, mainly because I didn't know the French word for it.

Seduction of Crowns

A boy-band heart throb. A violent kidnap. A female cop’s daring rescue. A spark to fire the passion of love.

When Sergeant Sophia Castellana stumbles into an international terrorist attack, things are not as they seem. Global forces beyond her grasp sweep her up into an audacious scheme to re-unite a world in chaos Superstar Charles Gonin wants his rescuer Sophia by his ...

A DEAD RED CADILLAC

#1 in THE DEAD RED MYSTERY SERIES Like Janet Evanovich? Sue Grafton? You’ll love this humorous mystery series! Deeply buried and deadly secrets resurface with a drowned Cadillac Her trophy red Caddy has been hijacked and now police ask how an elderly woman, who couldn’t possibly see beyond the hood ornament, is found strapped into the driver’s seat and six feet under water?

Kids Say The Darndest Things To Santa Claus Volume 2

Ever wonder what children say to Santa Claus at Christmastime? Or what it would be like to don the Santa suit and portray jolly old St. Nick? Follow this volunteer Santa, author Don Kennedy, as he visits kids for the past 25 years at hospitals, military bases, women's and children's shelters, community centers, school, churches and more. Hundreds of fun, hilarious, laugh-out-loud plus heartwarming ...

ADAM: Her Deal Maker

Making a sexy deal with the deal-maker... Flying sightseers over California is part of helicopter pilot Lacey Sanders' job. The other part is denying her attraction for hot-bod fellow pilot Adam Swank. A painful experience taught Lacey never to date her co-workers. So regardless of how sizzling the sparks are between her and Adam, she just isn't going there. But when they're teamed up to close a b ...

If You See Kay Hide

Ladies, do you need a good giggle-snort? Bobbi Jax, AKA BJ is a magnet for trouble. But this time it looks like things are turning themselves around. BJ hits the lottery when her dog, Twinkles, suddenly starts pooping glitter and jewels. It’s almost like BJ has her very own golden goose. Yup, life is turning from bar rags to riches. Sorta. If only BJ could ignore the odd set of characters that pra ...

‘Tis the Season to Feel Inadequate, Holidays, Special Occasions and Other Times Our Celebrations Get Out of Hand

It’s the American way to create a celebration for everything, then turn it into a chore or worse, a nightmare. ’Tis the Season to Feel Inadequate is a collection of humorous essays about how we let our expectations steal the joy out of Christmas and other holidays and special events. It’s understanding for those who think Christmas form letters can be honest—or they can be interesting. And it’s em ...

Beyond Dead

Bridget Sway is newly dead. And confused. Instead of cloud cars and harp-playing cherubs, the afterlife is working a full-time job that doesn’t pay and a heinous communal living situation with housemates who have no concept of privacy or personal space. As if that wasn’t bad enough, on her first day at work Bridget finds a dead ghost stuffed in her locker. With the afterlife police looking t ...

The Faux Fang Murders

Carnivorous garden gnomes or mutant sewer monsters. Nothing is too weird for intrepid paranormal reporter Aurora North. Especially as she usually finds the logical, and deeply unparanormal, explanation for it all. When her editor asks her to check out an alleged vampire attack, Aurora is absolutely certain it’s nothing but a stunt for the university theatre production of Dracula ... until she disc ...

Murder on a Moon Trek

Sylvia Stryker has no business being on the next Moon Unit Cruise Line, unless you count aspirations and dreams. The career that once felt within her reach—Intergalactic Cruise Ship Security—disappeared the day her dad was arrested for collusion with space pirates. Since then she’s begrudgingly been running the ice mine for her aging mother, the two of them social pariahs amongst their fellow Plun ...

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